Skype? Where you from?
Shilpa42
Active Member
Tks for kind words Dana...much loveIt is such a good question ShilpaI think it is because people are scared to confront their own sexuality; it is easier to invalidate someone who is freed up like you rather than question your heretofore unquestioned truths. If they questioned why they thought being a slut was so bad, then they would have to confront some really painful stuff - e.g. how come they are so repressed? e.g. why they are stuck in a hopeless marriage? etc. It is much more easy and in the short term more profitable to make you wrong. I am so proud to know there are such beautiful and expressed Whore-Slut-Goddess like you.. and me
You are so loved... and so beautiful ...
Its nothing bad.
You don't need to care about what other people say.
And people like me love sluts and whores like you
S
StacieXoX
Guest
Nothing at all wrong with being a slut, I'm one myself, and I'm proud of it
You say you are a whore. A whore and a slut are two different things. But people do use the word slut in a negative sense and it is part of a social double standard. Women that like to fuck are called sluts and men that like to fuck are called studs. The term "stud" is viewed as a positive thing about a man and the word "slut" is viewed as a negative thing.
The reason for this double standard is that men have a natural urge to fuck as many women as they can. But they want a woman that fucks just them. Since there are basically equal numbers of men and women on the planet that doesn't work. So, the effort to create social and religious shame for women that like fucking is a control device.
In reality women have a much greater sexual capacity then men and if it were not for this social stigma that is twisted into the minds of girls at a young age we would be fucking more than men do. Let me put it this way: At a party I have fucked my husband and three other guys. The guys were all able to do me twice. But then they were wiped out. I could have fucked all night and had countless orgasms. How many men do you know that could fuck four women twice and still be capable of more? See the point: Men have shamed us about sex to keep us from exploring our natural capacity. I am not bitter about it but just giving the answer to the question in the OP.
The reason for this double standard is that men have a natural urge to fuck as many women as they can. But they want a woman that fucks just them. Since there are basically equal numbers of men and women on the planet that doesn't work. So, the effort to create social and religious shame for women that like fucking is a control device.
In reality women have a much greater sexual capacity then men and if it were not for this social stigma that is twisted into the minds of girls at a young age we would be fucking more than men do. Let me put it this way: At a party I have fucked my husband and three other guys. The guys were all able to do me twice. But then they were wiped out. I could have fucked all night and had countless orgasms. How many men do you know that could fuck four women twice and still be capable of more? See the point: Men have shamed us about sex to keep us from exploring our natural capacity. I am not bitter about it but just giving the answer to the question in the OP.
Although I feel bitter reading this, I have to agree with you.
Personally the word "whore" is ultimately off-putting. Most of the fake women in chat will use a nickname that is painfully obvious, and one that points to some part of male group mentality. It's rather bizarre, and if you are a woman with extreme desires or appetites, names like those will always go against you simply because it's a flag for fakery. Self deprecation is not sexy in my opinion. Sluttiness is not self deprecating.
That being said, each to their own. In the selfish world of online attraction, anything goes
That being said, each to their own. In the selfish world of online attraction, anything goes
Why do you feel bitter?
In other words, what "a man" needs is a woman that wants sex just as much as he does. Thus he is a stud and she is a slut. I agree with what you are saying. Men do want a woman that loves sex. But it is important to get it that all men really want is a woman that loves sex like they love sex. And the only reason that woman don't always feel that way about sex is because there is an attempt to condition us from youth up that sex is nasty... a forbidden fruit. If it were not for this brainwashing woman would be as urgent about sex as men are. Woman that don't buy into the brainwashing are branded as sluts. But most men don't want a wife that is a slut. They want a wife that only fucks them. Meanwhile the hope that the girl they work with will be their side dish slut. I am not being critical. I am just explaining why there is disparity is male and female sex drive.
M0RRIS
Member
Shelly you are right ..and it IS a deep seated problem .. Men don't want a thorough-going slut as a wife. I don't know if that will or can change. Do women want a husband that freely puts it about.. I doubt it, it is the same for both. As for the 'disparity' I think the strength of the sex-drive varies so much in both sexes. And possibly there is a threshold strength.. above which both sexes Will by hook or by crook, be promiscuous and 'interested' in a wide spectrum of sexual activity.
Arioco
Member
With your smile and face you can proclaime you what you want.
Two kind of people say being a slut is bad; men who can't have you, or women who would like to behave like whores and don't dare.
Most women DO NOT want their husband to fuck other women. So that part is about the same for both the typical husband and the typical wife. Also, there are other concerns that have not been addressed. Pregnancy and STD. Most men do not want to raise some other guys kid and nobody, male or female wants STD. So there are good reasons to not just go around fucking strangers. However, the concern about a wife or a husband enjoying sexual variety goes beyond concern about pregnancy or STD. For the typical wife or husband the real issue is jealousy.
Some men get very jealous if other men scan their wife. Likewise, many women get upset if a girl starts to flirt with her husband or if her husband is around an attractive woman that is dressed a little provocatively.
The fact that these feelings of jealousy are common doesn't not make them healthy. They are normal in the sense that they are typical. But running in circles screaming might be typical in an insane asylum but it doesn't mean that it is healthy.
But stop and think how the sexual dynamics of a marriage change if just that one ingredient, jealousy, is extracted. For example, lets say that a man has an attractive wife. The same guy enjoys watching woman fuck in porn videos. Without jealousy he might enjoy watching his wife fuck even more than he enjoys watching videos of women fucking. Unlike the world of porn he can share in the event. We were married for 15 years before my husband explained why he was open to the possibility of doing a mfm with me. I did not need a lot of coaxing. We both enjoyed it. If he was the jealous type it would have been a major crash and burn event.
Eventually I felt like it would only be fair to let him enjoy a FMF. The first time we did that I did feel jealous. It is just a very ingrained social concept. But logically I knew better and I had to work on my feelings. Now when we swap or do things that involve another woman I have come to really enjoy watching him with another woman just like he enjoys watching me.
My point is that the social/sexual stigma involved is generated from the toxic force of jealousy.
Some men get very jealous if other men scan their wife. Likewise, many women get upset if a girl starts to flirt with her husband or if her husband is around an attractive woman that is dressed a little provocatively.
The fact that these feelings of jealousy are common doesn't not make them healthy. They are normal in the sense that they are typical. But running in circles screaming might be typical in an insane asylum but it doesn't mean that it is healthy.
But stop and think how the sexual dynamics of a marriage change if just that one ingredient, jealousy, is extracted. For example, lets say that a man has an attractive wife. The same guy enjoys watching woman fuck in porn videos. Without jealousy he might enjoy watching his wife fuck even more than he enjoys watching videos of women fucking. Unlike the world of porn he can share in the event. We were married for 15 years before my husband explained why he was open to the possibility of doing a mfm with me. I did not need a lot of coaxing. We both enjoyed it. If he was the jealous type it would have been a major crash and burn event.
Eventually I felt like it would only be fair to let him enjoy a FMF. The first time we did that I did feel jealous. It is just a very ingrained social concept. But logically I knew better and I had to work on my feelings. Now when we swap or do things that involve another woman I have come to really enjoy watching him with another woman just like he enjoys watching me.
My point is that the social/sexual stigma involved is generated from the toxic force of jealousy.
M0RRIS
Member
Well said .. That old 'green-eyed monster' .. the trouble is ,sex is one of our most ancient drives, and the ingrained attitudes that go with that, are the most resilient to change, regardless of the perceived need. And it has to be said, Joe Schmo & his wife, consider the status quo, a given rather than a choice or an option . We are probably denizens of the 'wild-frontier' of sex ..
That's an interesting question...is there a number of partners? Do you even need to have vaginal sex? Is it based on number of partners in a given time period...questioning minds want to know...
That depends on what your definition of "slut" is. My first response on this thread drew attention to the fact that being a slut and being a whore are two different things. By standard definition it is pretty easy to see when a person becomes a whore. By standard definition a whore is a person who sells sexual favors for money. So the first time a person has sex for money they become a whore. But society tends to define a slut as a woman that is comfortable having sex with a variety of men. So by those definitions I am a slut but not a whore. I don't mind the word slut if the meaning was limited to the fact that I enjoy sex and I enjoy variety. But society uses the word slut in a way that makes it seem like it is a nasty girl that likes to fuck. Thus the word carries a very negative connotation. That in fact is what the OP was getting at.
I wish that society viewed the word slut the way they view the word stud. I think it would be a much better world if women that are good at sex and that enjoy sex were valued and cherished.
Aside from those footnote points the question at hand is: When does a girl become a slut?
I would say that it is not just a matter of having had a number of boy friends and thus a number of sex partners. I think the "slut" aspect emerges when we are in a sexual relationship with someone but still willing to have sex with others. Or, it could be a girl that doesn't have a regular boy friend but will date and fuck whenever she wants to.
In my case I think I became a slut after I had been married for 15 years and had been exclusively sexual with just my husband. But then my husband got interested in the concept of wife-sharing and I ended up having sex with a guy that I worked with at the time. The moment he penetrated me I probably became a slut in the positive sense of the word.
Shilpa42
Active Member
Great reply dear. Thank you for you insitght. I guess we must be proud to be slut just like how guys are happy to be studs.
Another twist on this is that I think the word "slut" in itself has a pretty sound regardless of the meaning. Some words just sound awkward. Like the word awkward. But to me the word slut just roles off my tongue. I like the word stud too but really slut is somehow an unusually pretty sounding word to me. So if the word were generally used in a positive way simple to describe a woman that enjoys sex and sexual variety then it would be wonderful to be called a slut.
My husband and I have talked about that term a lot and he says the same thing. Relative to the positive way of using that word he says he loves to think of my as his slut wife. So I am ok with being viewed as a slut in that context. But if it is used in a degrading way then I find it offensive. I reject the term the way it is used by society in general. Using it in a negative sense just serves to further the stigma about women that love sex. The funny thing is that even though I know I have a much greater sexual capacity then most men I also know that my libido is really just typical compared to most men. I do think about sex all the time and I am a happy camper if I fuck at least once a day. I am pretty sure that most guys would like to fuck at least once a day. So it drives me crazy when a woman simple enjoys and wants what men enjoy and want and yet men degrade such a woman by calling her a tramp, whore, bitch or slut.
I don't want to get too far off point here but I have been using this site for a short time and I have enjoyed some of the mail and chat I have had with both men and women. However, some guys write to me and start out saying things like "Hey bitch, wana cam with me?"
So here is my response to messages like that. Fuck off and do not bother to PM me. If you want a bitch go to the dog pound.
My husband and I have talked about that term a lot and he says the same thing. Relative to the positive way of using that word he says he loves to think of my as his slut wife. So I am ok with being viewed as a slut in that context. But if it is used in a degrading way then I find it offensive. I reject the term the way it is used by society in general. Using it in a negative sense just serves to further the stigma about women that love sex. The funny thing is that even though I know I have a much greater sexual capacity then most men I also know that my libido is really just typical compared to most men. I do think about sex all the time and I am a happy camper if I fuck at least once a day. I am pretty sure that most guys would like to fuck at least once a day. So it drives me crazy when a woman simple enjoys and wants what men enjoy and want and yet men degrade such a woman by calling her a tramp, whore, bitch or slut.
I don't want to get too far off point here but I have been using this site for a short time and I have enjoyed some of the mail and chat I have had with both men and women. However, some guys write to me and start out saying things like "Hey bitch, wana cam with me?"
So here is my response to messages like that. Fuck off and do not bother to PM me. If you want a bitch go to the dog pound.