People say I drink too much coffee, but I go hours without having a coffee, it’s called sleeping. 
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I’m a coffeeholic on the road to recovery... Just kidding I’m on the road to the coffee shop.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought... “Yep... you have a person locked in your basement.”
Having a dirty mind makes ordinary conversation Much more interesting.
If you don’t laugh during sex at least once, you’re having sex with the wrong person.
Life is like sex, you can either lie back and let it screw you, or you can get on top and ride the hell out of it.
Still haven’t made up my mind where to vacation this year. I’m debating between the bedroom or the living room. -
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